so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
