He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
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