I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
