do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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