last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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