my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Randomize
