Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Randomize
