she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
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