So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Randomize
