I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
