I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Can I color on your dick again?
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
He did a backflip because drugs
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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