She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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