Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(903): View more from Texas

I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.

(214): View more from Texas

kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.

(903): View more from Texas

I'll be there in 10

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(903): I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem. (214): kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night. (903): I'll be there in 10 http://tfl.nu/kykh

Replies (19) Good night (5921) Bad night (758)
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(309): View more from Illinois

so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.

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(309): so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday. http://tfl.nu/j6eg

Replies (8) Good night (5382) Bad night (813)
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(216): View more from Ohio

oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.

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(216): oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs. http://tfl.nu/udb9

Replies (28) Good night (755) Bad night (6114)
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(775): View more from Nevada

I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.

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(775): I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps. http://tfl.nu/bl0l

Replies (24) Good night (755) Bad night (5579)
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(785): View more from Kansas

There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.

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(785): There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill. http://tfl.nu/tym2

Replies (10) Good night (2819) Bad night (1001)
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(315): View more from New York

I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.

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(315): I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever. http://tfl.nu/6dcd

Replies (20) Good night (6387) Bad night (1111)
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(574): View more from Indiana

It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.

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(574): It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later. http://tfl.nu/qtru

Replies (9) Good night (2301) Bad night (1001)
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(949): View more from California

Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter

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(949): Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter http://tfl.nu/gh1h

Replies (7) Good night (833) Bad night (1558)
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(337): View more from Louisiana

Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?

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(337): Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think? http://tfl.nu/0xiw

Replies (9) Good night (904) Bad night (1235)
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(719): View more from Colorado

U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..

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(719): U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am.. http://tfl.nu/svag

Replies (12) Good night (1381) Bad night (615)
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(678): View more from Georgia

I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.

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(678): I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos. http://tfl.nu/fnmm

Replies (7) Good night (979) Bad night (478)
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(715): View more from Wisconsin

On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.

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(715): On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good. http://tfl.nu/74vq

Replies (11) Good night (1310) Bad night (432)
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(706): View more from Georgia

It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...

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(706): It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend... http://tfl.nu/nn4b

Replies (6) Good night (1141) Bad night (597)
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(416): View more from Toronto

Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.

(416): View more from Toronto

NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.

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(416): Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement. (416): NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada. http://tfl.nu/6stg

Replies (6) Good night (1503) Bad night (334)
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(773): View more from Illinois

there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.

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(773): there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him. http://tfl.nu/ujhc

Replies (4) Good night (1240) Bad night (259)

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