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• (248): View more from Michigan

  real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club

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• (609): View more from New Jersey

  i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty

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• (616): View more from Michigan

  who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss

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• (845): View more from New York

  I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?

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  21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today

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• (651): View more from Minnesota

  Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again

  (1-570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Dibsssss

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• (770): View more from Georgia

  That would warm my breasts.

  (770): View more from Georgia

  In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.

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• (510): View more from California

  I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.

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  19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (678): View more from Georgia

  ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do

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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.

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• (803): View more from South Carolina

  Should I go sleeveless of strapless?

  (1-803): View more from South Carolina

  Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.

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• (828): View more from North Carolina

  ...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'll just say I told you so at your funeral

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