A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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