Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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