exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize