I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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