well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
And my parents said I crawled through the house
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize