that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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