did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
You ate ashes out of my bong
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
