did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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