never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
