Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Randomize