Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
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I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
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My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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