I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
BRING THE BAGELS
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
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