Do vagina's smell?
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
