We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
