I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
The power of my boobs compel you
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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