omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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