Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
