I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
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