he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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