whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Randomize
