Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
You pole danced in your parka.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
