oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
