so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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