you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Randomize
