maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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