Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
