Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
