i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
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