drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
