I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
i think i scared a bird with my dick
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
