Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Randomize