For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Randomize
