She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Women Confess 25 Instant Deal-Breakers On A Man’s Dating Profile
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions