every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
