I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
