I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
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You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
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And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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